Remember THE line from the movie, Jerry McGuire?  

“You had me at hello.”  I think another movie should quote a more powerful line, “I am proud of my goodbye.”
 
The last time I saw a cousin of mine was at a family funeral.  He was standing behind the soloist and as the singer performed, it gave the impression he was singing.   I could not wait to tease him about how funny it looked. We laughed together and I hugged him goodbye.
 
Saturday I entered the Presbyterian Church and sat on the back row of a crowded sanctuary. It was surreal as I watched family members enter the church looking shocked and confused.  Only a month ago, I laughed and hugged my cousin, now I was attending his funeral.
 
My cousin’s death was premature. It was not the way it is was supposed to be. Why did he decide to end his life?  There were so many questions and those of us left behind can only assume the answers. I knew of his public mistakes and disappointments.  I also know my own mistakes and disappointments … the only difference is the word, public.
 
Sitting a few rows in front of me was a person who was extremely rude to me at my sister’s wake.  Her words were so hurtful, untrue and inappropriate.  I chose not to become angry and simply say, “I do not receive what you are saying to me.”
 
Only hours later, I was at the beach comforting my best childhood friend.  She received an email saying her mother had been placed in a nursing home.  My friend was on vacation for the first time in five years.  She was her mother’s caregiver.  Other family thought this was the best course of action and took advantage of the timing.
 
My heart is broken for the entire family since I understand being consumed with a mother’s well-being and the hurt of broken trust.
 
In all of these circumstances, words and actions made the difference. Words can pierce the heart and words can heal. Be proud of your words and deeds; weigh them carefully.
 
Life can change in a flash and we are left with our conscience.  Ask yourself this question, “Can I live with what I just said or did?”  
 
The answer may make a huge difference for you and your peace of mind.